A crutch on each arm, Steven Souza Jr. made his way slowly onto a dais, then gingerly lowered himself into a chair. As he spoke, his eyes had their usual intensity, but his voice sometimes wavered and cracked.

Less than two weeks removed from suffering a devastating knee injury, Souza sounded as if he had made peace with what happened, had come to grips with what it meant for his future. But it seemed he hadn’t yet accepted what it meant for those around him. In his mind, he had let down not only his teammates and his organization, but also Diamondbacks fans.

“You know, I just want to be back out playing baseball, I think, more than anything,” Souza said, seemingly on the verge of tears.

“I can play this game and I don’t want people to forget that – especially the Arizona fans. I’ve been here for (72) games, but you better believe I can play this game. And I’m going to come back and I’m going to play this game at a high level and I’m going to show you that no matter what has happened in the past, I can play this game.”

There was a sad juxtaposition to Souza’s first session with reporters since the injury. A half-hour earlier, Red Sox slugger J.D. Martinez sat in the visitors’ dugout and spoke about how he would have liked to have re-signed with the Diamondbacks two offseasons ago.

Then came Souza, the player the Diamondbacks acquired to replace Martinez, sounding apologetic for the way his time in Arizona has gone. Late in spring training in 2018, Souza dived for a ball in the gap and suffered a pectoral injury that wound up wrecking his season.

He had wanted this to be the year he could finally deliver on what the Diamondbacks had hoped to be getting when they acquired him from the Tampa Bay Rays as part of a three-team deal last year.

But in the second-to-last exhibition game of the spring Souza slipped as he crossed home plate on a double by Ketel Marte. It was as routine as could be – there wasn’t even a play at the plate – but Souza’s leg hyperextended and he tumbled head-over-heels. He did massive damage to the knee, tearing three ligaments and a capsule.

“When I went down again,” Souza said, “my heart just dropped for my teammates. For (General Manager) Mike Hazen, for bringing me over here. And everyone. This team means a lot to me and to not be out there with them is killing me.”

Souza said the days immediately following his injury were dark. He admitted to wondering about his career. He said he found strength in faith. And he said he was buoyed by calls with other major leaguers who had experienced similar injuries, namely Angels infielder Zack Cozart.

“I think he kind of flipped my mind-set after the first couple of days when I just didn’t know,” Souza said. “I had never had an injury of this magnitude. Listening to him say, ‘I feel great. I don’t have any hesitations, any repercussions. I was great six months out.’”

Souza said the surgeon who performed his procedure, Cincinnati-based Dr. Timothy Kremchek, also did Cozart’s, and Kremchek said that both players’ knees “looked identical” at the time of surgery.

Souza made his way slowly onto the field on Friday afternoon for pregame introductions at the Diamondbacks’ home opener. Being there, he said, meant a lot to him so he could show the fans he’s still here, still working hard. He hopes it isn’t the last they see of him this year.

Souza said he isn’t even thinking about being ready in time for spring training next year. That, he seems to believe, is a given. What he wants to be ready for is October. That’s aggressive, but it lands in the front end of the six-to-nine month timetable he was given by Kremchek.

“I’m trying to do the best I can,” he said, “to be ready for the playoffs if that’s where we end up.”

Reach Piecoro at (602) 444-8680 or [email protected]. Follow him on Twitter @nickpiecoro.

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