Karina Bland introduces herself as she prepares to start a new Republic column.
Karina Bland, The Republic | azcentral.com
I looked up at the TV expecting to see Vice President Mike Pence wearing a gold uniform shirt with a command division insignia on his left chest.
Or maybe a space suit.
Dang.He was just in a regular suit. He had sounded like a starship captain. Really.
“Just as we’ve done in ages past, the United States will meet the emerging threats on this new battlefield,” Pence was saying, addressing military and civilian personnel at the Pentagon.
“The time has come to establish the United States Space Force.”
Was this for real? Pence’s announcement sounded like the plot for a summer blockbuster movie.
Then again, I’m a huge sci-fi fan, and Pence was proposing a new branch of the military that would defend America from any threats from space.
I know, it seems highly illogical. The Air Force Space Command already does all that, as does the Army’s Space and Missile Defense Command.
But I’ve had two great disappointments in my life. That I never got my acceptance letter from Hogwarts, and I didn’t get to go to Starfleet Academy.
So if there’s going to be a Space Force, beam me up.
I suspect they will do most recruiting at ComicCon, but I would be an ideal candidate. (You can scoff, but it wouldn’t be my first time sweet-talking a Klingon.)
At the academy, I would train in convincing button pushing, reconfiguring the sensor array, raising shields. Sarah Huckabee Sanders could teach The Main Deflector course. I’d learn to set my phaser to stun. Never give up, never surrender, and all that.
Sure, it would require billions of dollars and the approval of Congress. (As Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy said, “The bureaucratic mentality is the only constant in the universe.”)
I’m counting on Trump to make it so.
Resistance is futile. So I’ll be ready whenever my admission to Starfleet Academy arrives.
Unless I get my letter to Hogwarts first.
Reach Karina at firstname.lastname@example.org or 602-444-8614. Read more at karinabland.azcentral.com.
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